The Road Ahead and Miles Behind by Mike Ligouri

The Road Ahead and Miles Behind: A Story of Healing and Redemption between Father and Son (Morgan James Publishing, 152 pp. $12.95, paper; $9.95, Kindle) is a book about a road trip taken by a two-tour Iraq War veteran and his father. Although neither is a Vietnam War veteran, the book’s messages are meaningful to all who served in uniform.

The two drove cross country in a van to attend the Sebring 12 Hours race in November 2020. Mike Ligouri and his father James were quite dysfunctional and close to estranged. James Ligouri had caused the divorce by cheating on Mike’s mother. This caused a lot of bitterness.

Plus, Mike and his dad had never connected. Mike felt that his father was never there for him. “It’s an awful thing to admit you dislike someone you love,” he writes.

His father was a race car fanatic and Mike was not interested. Suddenly, out of the blue, his father called him about accompanying him on his annual road trip to Florida to see the race. Mike decided to go, even though his father had a track record of letting him down.

The eleven-day trip allowed the two to mend fences and find common ground. Mike worried that all that time with his father would exacerbate their problems. That didn’t happen, and the good news is that the book is not about eleven days of silence—or yelling. The two ended up discussing a wide range of topics. God and the afterlife, for instance, which gets an entire chapter. The trip does not turn Mike into a racing fanatic, but it’s successful in bridging the gap between father and son.

Early in the book, you will start thinking of your father (or son) and by the end of it, you will be pondering a road trip with him. The book is not bittersweet. However, it could create bittersweet memories in its readers.

Although Mike is a war veteran and alludes to PTSD issues, his book is not about a troubled veteran dealing with his inner demons.

Mike and his dad have a fairly common relationship. Many will relate to being on a different wavelength than their father. “Our parents want what’s best for us,” Mike observes. “We want to discover on our own what’s best for us.”

The book has a few themes that will stick with you. “Life is not meant to be done alone,” for example, and “Life is a race anyway. Might as well run it.” Father and son buy matching t-shirts that read, “It’s all about the ride.” The book shows that a ride, if it’s hours with your dad (or mom), can totally change a parent-child relationship. 

Mike Liguori

I suppose that could be for the worse, but this book concentrates on the positives. If you take a similar trip, you may find that you are more like your father than you think or want to admit. 

The Road Ahead and Miles Behind is a book that I highly recommend if you have a less-than- ideal relationship with your father (or son). By asking why your fatther did things that had a negative impact on your life you may learn that he was sheltering you from things that were bothering him. 

In the case of Mike and James Liguori, it was job problems. If your father has died, you might find comfort in realizing that any coldness you felt may have been his way of sheltering you from the grim realities of life.   

–Kevin Hardy

How to Cope with Stress after Trauma by E. Anna Goodwin

E. Anna Goodwin’s extraordinary How to Cope with Stress after Trauma (Bitterroot Mountain Publishing, 308 pp., $17.99, paper) was inspired by the experiences of her father and many other veterans. It is an embracing and empathetic guide for healing those suffering with trauma-induced stress.

Goodwin has compiled well-tested, curative procedures, combined with hope, for veterans with post-traumatic stress or post- traumatic stress syndrome. She explains the differences between the two in Part One of this volume.

The book begins with a self-administered stress test in which the reader evaluates how severe his or her PTSD is. Next are case studies that veterans will identify with, gathered from Goodwin’s psychotherapy career and workshops she has conducted. These accentuate her strong belief that since stress sufferers are not alone, they should not try healing alone. The therapeutic methods center on interactions with family, friends, and other veterans.

The “Twenty Steps To Help You Heal” in Part Two are clearly presented, emphasizing that some may apply to the veteran and some may not .They are organized so that the veteran can choose which healing steps are applicable, enabling an orderly healing process.

Prior to elaborating on the steps, I should note two items Goodwin quotes from along the way:

1. “Freeze, Fight, or Flight” as options for how to deal with stress coming from trauma.
2. The Healing Wall, a five-part poem by Patrick Overton.

Part Two presents the twenty healing steps with helpful subheadings, making an orderly pathway through the process. Some items are challenging, such as the suggestion that the veteran should organize his or her life developing self-confidence in pursuit of life as it was before the onset of trauma. Some suggestions are simpler, such as using a nightlight if you are experiencing nightmares or sleep-interrupting flashbacks.

A significant portion of Part Two centers on the veteran’s memories and how to distinguish them from the present. Keeping a journal is recommended to help figure out what is now and what was then. Recognizing items around your house such as pets, furniture, and children’s artworks or photographs taken before or after a traumatic event are very useful in healing and returning the veteran to life before trauma.

A strong point in Goodwin’s approach to healing is the use of journal writing or finding a creative outlet such as painting, photography, or poetry. All veterans and family members can benefit from sharing experiences by using diaries or artistic creations reflecting the veteran’s service experiences.

Another source of stress that the author studied is “second-hand trauma,” things such as witnessing a crime or natural or other catastrophe such as the September 11, 2001, attacks. These can be as debilitating as first-hand trauma.

Step 15 is a valuable method of healing—laughter and silliness. Movies, jokes, and playing with children can be paths to stress relief.

Part Three is aimed at family and friends of the veteran. It contains many useful tips to help others help the veteran return to an ordered, happy life with a spouse, siblings, parents, or children—or just plain peace of mind.

The author’s website is http://anaparkergoodwin.com

––Curt Nelson

God Help Me! Cause No One Else Will by Clyde Hoch

Clyde Hoch, a former U.S. Marine Sergeant and a member of Vietnam.Veterans of America, has written six books. His latest is God Help Me! Cause No One Else Will (CreateSpace, 34 pp., $5.38).

This self-help tract is dedicated to veterans with Traumatic Brain Injury and post-traumatic stress disorder. In a perfect world, this informative work would be in the hands of every Vietnam veteran, military family member, and every professional working with returned veterans and active-duty personnel.

Hoch, who volunteered for duty in a tank battalion, arrived in Vietnam during the 1968 Tet offensive. “I was an old guy,” he writes. “I was around 21 years old. Most of the guys were 18 or 19. They would come to me for advice about everything. I didn’t know much more than they did. At times I felt like a father and priest to these guys.”

Hoch’s value as leader and counselor easily could have qualified him to be a Drill.Sergeant or an officer candidate were it not for a land mine explosion. Because of the resultant Traumatic Brain Injury and difficulties with memory Hoch opted to end his career as a Marine .

His return to life as a civilian came before there was widespread recognition of PTSD as a war-related affliction. “There was no.such thing as PTSD or TBI,” he writes. “I became very aggressive with people, especially my wife. I took much out on her and my children. I regret all, but can’t do anything about it now. My attitude was very hard for all of us. I set up an appointment with the VA to.see if anyone could help me.”

Hoch filed PTSD and Agent Orange VA claims. “The service officer filed all of these forms,” he writes. “All came back rejected.” Further appeals were dismissed by doctors and lawyers.

Finally, after more than twenty years, Hoch began to offer advice and assistance to other veterans, something reminiscent of his relationship with his fellow tankers back in 1968.

In this book he provides important contact information for those in need.

“Do Not Give Up,” Hoch advises. “When I feel myself getting angry at a situation or person, I have learned to.walk away. I will.go outside. If I am where there are lots of people I observe them. I will wonder about their lives. Everyone you see is fighting something. If all else fails and you feel all alone and feel no one cares, contact me. I will do what I can for you.”

You can contact Clyde Hoch through his website, www.clydehoch.com

—Curt Nelson

hochclyde@yahoo.com.

Peak Business Performance Under Pressure by Bill Driscoll

“Way over the top” was my first impression of Peak Business Performance Under Pressure: A Navy Ace Shows How to Make Great Decisions in the Heat of Business Battle by Bill Driscoll and Peter Joffre Nye (Allworth Press, 210 pp., $19.95). The length of the title alone overwhelmed me. And then a flood of endorsements by admirals and a rousing blessing in the Forward by Sen. John McCain further wowed me. The wealth of hoopla turns out to be justified.

Driscoll presents an inspirational blend of personal experience and advice from others in offering his formula on how to be a successful executive leader. And he does it with boundless enthusiasm.

The blend includes his experiences from a forty-year association with the U.S. Navy Fighter Weapons School (TOPGUN) and twenty-six years of selling real estate, along with interviews with more than 200 senior executives and twenty-six Ace fighter pilots.

Along with Randy “Duke” Cunningham, Driscoll became an Ace while flying 170 Navy F-4 Phantom missions in the Vietnam War. Driscoll opens the book with an account of his final mission in which his crew destroyed three MIGs before being shot down by a surface-to-air missile. That success had created momentary complacency that nearly killed the crew. The remainder of the book presents similar lessons.

Driscoll’s “Peak Performance” goal is winning every time. His credo for cockpit or boardroom is: “The day you stop wanting to be better is the day you stop being good.”

Bill Driscoll

Success in any endeavor requires a person to “follow every element of the Peak Performance Formula, every day,” Driscoll says. Each element has its own chapter. The lessons contain steps to maximize success.

Each chapter ends with a probing question-and-answer “debrief,” much like what follows a combat mission.

Overall, the text is to the point and personalized so that the reader easily becomes involved in the discussion. At the same time, the book resembles a training manual because it is interspersed with facts and advice that parallel the topic at hand.

You don’t have to be seeking success in business to benefit from reading this book. Driscoll provides suggestions for behavior that can enhance just about anyone’s everyday life. Although highly zealous, he recognizes when enough is enough and helps the reader to do the same.

The author’s web site is www.willydriscoll.com

—Henry Zeybel

Love Our Vets by Welby O’Brien

Love Our Vets: Restoring Hope for Families of Veterans with PTSD (Deep River Books, 216 pp., $15.99, paper) is a conversationally written self-help book designed for wives and other family members of veterans dealing with post-traumatic stress disorder. Author Welby O’Brien, who has an MA in counseling and his written widely about divorce and other family subjects, is the wife of a veteran who has PTSD.

In her book, O’Brien takes a practical approach to the problem, proffering sixty-three questions about PTSD, along with her answers, as well as other words of advice, including “A Prayer a Day.” The book, she says, “is not a treatise on PTSD, nor at attempt to fix it,” nor a “marriage/relationship manual.” Instead, O’Brien has set out to “provide comfort, encouragement, and practical help for spouses, families, and all other loved ones of veterans with PTSD.”

Welby O’Brien

One example of the book’s tone and content is O’Brien’s answer to the question: “He is drawn to war movies. Should I discourage him from watching them because it seems to not be helpful at all?”

“The best thing we can do is connect with them,” O’Brien counsels. “If you can handle it, watch it with him. Personally, I cannot watch war movies…. Our job is not to fix or to change, but we are privileged to be close enough to love them and connect. If they choose to open up at any level, that is a beautiful thing for both. Any discussion does not require a mutually agreed-upon solution. What a freeing concept!”

The author’s website is www.loveourvets.org

—Marc Leepson

The Trauma Tool Kit by Susan Pease Banitt

Scores of books have been written about post-traumatic stress disorder—what it is and how to deal with it. The latest is The Trauma Tool Kit: Healing PTSD From the Inside Out (Quest Books, 305 pp., $18.95, paper) by Susan Pease Banitt, a psychotherapist who has been seeing patients for more than three decades and who also is a certified teacher of hatha yoga.

Banitt points out in her book that when she was in her forties she “was shaken to the core with an eruption of PTSD from the bowels of my being.” The author does not dwell on the details of her own case of PTSD in the book. But she now recommends spiritual and holistic modialities such as acupuncture and naturopathic treatment for her patients with PTSD.

Those and many other treatments are part of the “trauma tool kit” that Banitt explores in her book. The author does not directly address PTSD in veterans of the Vietnam War or any other conflict. However, veterans with PTSD should be able to use the ideas, information, and practices Banitt includes in her “tool kit.”

The author’s website is www.insightouthealing.com

When the War Never Ends by Leah Wizelman

Leah Wizelman, a biologist and researcher at the Technical University of Munich in Germany, specializes in the psycho physiological aspects of post-traumatic stress disorder. In her new book, When the War Never Ends: The Voices of Military Members with PTSD and Their Families (Rowman & Littlefield, 176 pp., $32), Wizelman presents thirty-two of these voices: short, first person accounts by veterans from the United States, Canada, Australia, and Germany who have PTSD. The voices also include several spouses of the veterans.

Several of the veterans served in the Vietnam War. All describe in intimate (and sometimes painful) detail the effects of PTSD on their daily lives.

“Talking to a therapist seems to be helping,” says one Vietnam War Marine Corps veteran, “also being on an antidepressant called Fluoxetine. As for my family, the best support they can give me is to be there for me and to try to understand. I hope to get my life back.”

—Marc Leepson

When Johnny and Jane Come Marching Home by Paula J. Caplan

Paula J. Caplan, a much-published clinical and research psychologist, has taken a special interest in emotional issues facing veterans returning home from war since the start of the war in Iraq. Her latest book, When Johnny and Jane Came Marching Home: How All of Us Can Help Veterans (MIT Press, 282 pp., $27.95), stemmed from her realization about  “common vets’ problems and dilemmas,” she says. Some of the problems, Caplan writes, “have been created by well-meaning people who do not stop to consider what helps and what hurts vets—and that there is good reason to believe the suffering can be alleviated.”

Caplan, an Associate at Harvard University’s DuBois Institute and a Fellow at the Women and Public Policy Program in Harvard’s Kennedy School of Government, goes on to make her case that there are other ways aside from psychotherapy and drugs to help veterans suffering emotionally from war-time trauma.

“We sent many Vietnam and Gulf War vets behind psychotherapists’ doors to deal with their anguish, and we’ve come to think it’s the best thing to do,” she writes. “Unfortunately, in our over-psychologized society, we’ve also come to think that it’s the only thing to do.

“We’ve failed to learn what the vets of previous wars have taught us—that although therapists clearly help some soldiers, there is only so much emotional damage from war they can fix.”

Instead, Caplan believes that the military should work on emotional problems “on the battlefront” and as soon as troops get home. She also believes that all Americans should “shoulder a bit of the burden of helping our soldiers and our returning civilians with their reentry into ordinary life back in the United States.”

Caplan’s website is http://whenjohnnyandjanecomemarching.weebly.com

—Marc Leepson

Shock Waves by Cynthia Orange

Cynthia Orange’s Shock Waves: A Practical Guide to Living With a Loved One’s PTSD (Hazelden, 187 pp., $14.95, paper) lives up to its subtitle. Orange, who is married to a Vietnam veteran with PTSD, has written a useful guidebook for anyone living with someone who suffers from post-traumatic stress disorder—whether it stems from being in combat or from going thorough any other type of traumatic event.

Orange, who has written extensively about this topic, also helps run a PTSD caregivers’ support group.

—Marc Leepson

From the Jungle to the Boardroom by Mike Monahan

Vietnam veteran Mike Monahan is a well-known speaker in the personal-development field. His book, From the Jungle to the Boardroom (Beacon Publishing, 150 pp., $20), provides business leadership lessons based on those that the author learned during his 1969-70 tour of duty in Vietnam. 

Monahan opens the book with two very short chapters on his year in the war zone. “I’m proud that I served in Vietnam,” he says, “but hate the fact that we never seem to learn from our mistakes.”

The balance of this readable book deals with the three questions that Monahan asked himself in Vietnam and ones, he says, he still asks himself each day: “Am I prepared? Am I safe? Am I alone?” 

These are “leadership questions,” Monahan says. “We’re all leaders, twenty-four hours a day—we’re leading ourselves and we’re leading others at work and at home.”

The author’s website is http://www.thinkmonahan.com/

—Marc Leepson